Friday, December 9, 2011

Being Non-Confrontational Isn't Necessarily Bad

I don't know about most people, but I prefer to stay well-grounded. Staying calm and maintaining a positive attitude is what I consider to be a daily goal.

I can admit that:

1.) I am introverted.
2.) I absolutely do not like confrontations.
3.) I view things as being "half-full" rather than being "half-empty."
4.) Whatever you do, whether good or bad, you will be rewarded according to your actions. This is also known as karma.
5.) If you piss me off, then it's on.

Just because you don't like confrontations, doesn't mean that you can't stand up for yourself or other people. It simply means that you are more level-headed, and willing to listen. You eventually learn that you can't save everyone or fix everything. You can't take everything seriously.

Sometimes when people consider you to be nice, meek, or humble, they take advantage of you. This is when you have to give them a reality check. Letting them know you are not their gofer, their doormat, or the toilet tissue that they wipe their asses with. Whether you are running a business, or trying to make it one day at a time, you realize that people will always try to get over on you.

Take this clip about Tyra Banks on "Dinner With The King" for example:



Now, I realize that some people may be passive-aggressive. How do you know if you are?

According to the Counselling Directory:

"Passive aggressive behaviour takes many forms but can generally be described as a non-verbal aggression that manifests in negative behavior. It is where you are angry with someone but do not or cannot tell them. Instead of communicating honestly when you feel upset, annoyed, irritated or disappointed you may instead bottle the feelings up, shut off verbally, give angry looks, make obvious changes in behaviour, be obstructive, sulky or put up a stone wall. It may also involve indirectly resisting requests from others by evading or creating confusion around the issue. Not going along with things. It can either be covert (concealed and hidden) or overt (blatant and obvious). "

-This is a whole other issue.

Getting back...

Sometimes, you will need to get stern, loud, angry, or downright ugly with some people in order for them to take you seriously. It's okay. Don't hold everything in.

From what I have learned it's essential to maintain a balance. If more people would actually listen, think, and demonstrate respect then a great deal of heated situations would be averted.

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